Bittersweet Lies (Bittersweet-Series Book 1) Page 4

  I can’t believe it.

  What has gotten into him, into me? Why didn’t I listen to my intuition?

  He is not good for me, I even said so, and yet I still rubbed against him like some randy cat!

  He came onto me, whispered naughty things in my ear, which he probably says to every woman he wants to bed – on the floor, against the wall, wherever. And I permitted it. Shit!

  And I’m sure I don’t want to become his next conquest, which he later would brag about to his friends.

  For him, I’m nothing more than a challenge he needs to conquer. An exciting game where he sees himself as the winner. He’s not interested in my feelings, doesn’t care about me, he made that perfectly clear. Fuck, he doesn’t even want me here!

  The two of us could have been caught. At any time, Shane or Liam could have come up and found us in that compromising position.

  I was naked, completely naked!

  However, I do not care about the consequences at that moment. My senses were solely focused on the stunning man in front of me, who held me so possessively in his arms and only had eyes for me.

  I’m so unbelievably angry with him. However, I’m even angrier with myself.

  “Brooke?” Liam calls out, abruptly ripping me out of my bewilderment. “Everything okay in there?”

  “Yes. I just had a little accident on the way to the bathroom.”

  If he knew …

  “Are you hurt?” he asks. Hearing his concern, my guilty conscience makes a sudden appearance.

  Sorry, Liam, but I cannot tell you the truth. Not yet.

  “No, no. I’m fine. Really. Please, don’t worry about me. I merely stumbled and dropped my …”

  Dammit! My clothes are still scattered on the floor in the hallway.

  Once my brain kicked in again, I couldn’t get away quickly enough from Blake and left the mess behind.

  How am I supposed to explain that to him?

  “Your things?” he finishes my sentence and I nod resignedly even though I know he cannot see me.

  “I’m sorry,” I say contritely. “I’ll take care of it at once.”

  “What will you take care of? Your stuff is neatly folded next to the door.”

  What? But how …?

  “Oh,” is my quite unimaginative answer.

  “Right,” I correct myself. “I left my underwear in the room and put the stuff in front of the bathroom door. On the way back, I must have forgotten them.”

  “Oh, is that so?” I can tell Liam is smirking on the other side of the door.

  Seriously, Brooke? Underwear? You couldn’t have come up with a better excuse?

  Embarrassed, I clear my throat. “It won’t happen again.”

  “What? That you forget your sexy lingerie?” he teases.

  “Not. Funny.” I complain, suppressing a smile that’s trying to sneak onto my lips. This situation is so strange, I don’t know whether to scream, cry, or laugh.

  “Besides, it’s NOT sexy lingerie.”

  “Should I check it out?” he offers selflessly.

  Of course!

  “No, thank you, that’s okay.”

  “Spoilsport,” he mumbles sulkily, sounding somehow totally sweet.

  “If you don’t mind, I’d like to shower now.”

  “Alone?”

  “Obviously alone.”

  “The shower is big enough for both of us. I have time and wouldn’t mind …” he says suggestively and I roll my eyes exaggeratedly.

  “Let me guess …” I say tapping my chin thoughtfully. “… you’re offering to wash my back?”

  “If you ask nicely, I’d be glad to help out with other body parts too,” he whispers.

  His words cause goose bumps to spread across my entire body. “Is that so?”

  Even though I know I should send him away and end our little game, I’m unable. For this, he’s much too charming.

  Just a little longer.

  We are separated by a closed door, what can happen to me?

  Besides, I could use a little distraction right now.

  Yes, Liam is damn hot. Just like his brother who, by the way, I’m presently actually trying to forget. But he can also be quite cute and humorous. Apparently, he’s been spared the asshole gene.

  “Close your eyes and imagine I’m with you now, Brooke. Just the two of us. Naked in the shower. My body behind yours. My hands gently massaging your soft skin with shower gel in circular motions. I start with the back of your neck, which I playfully tease with my teeth, then on to your shoulders, which I tenderly brush with my lips. With my fingertips, I trace each individual vertebra, touch the wet warm skin, and make you sigh wistfully. Your small, nicely shaped ass in my hands, which requires more care and almost robs me of my mind. My co–”

  “Stop!” I interrupt him, gasping. “I’d like to shower now.” Cold, I add to myself.

  “My offer stands,” he says roughly and waits for my decision.

  However, I don’t have to decide. There is only one right thing to do, I know that, and yet I still hesitate.

  Yes, Liam and Blake are my personal embodiment of temptation. I’m not even here one day and already those two are messing with my emotional state.

  “Well, see you later.” My voice is so soft, I’m not sure if he even hears me.

  Please, just go, I silently beg and close my eyes.

  I need time.

  Time to make sense of the chaos inside my head. There are so many questions for which I have no answers.

  What’s the reason for Blake’s change?

  Why doesn’t he want me here?

  What did I do to him?

  Why treat me like a stranger he cannot stand, only to press me possessively against his body in the next moment?

  Why is Liam acting so differently toward me?

  Why is he suddenly interested in me?

  Is he serious or is he testing me?

  And why the hell can’t I get rid of the feeling that those two have made it their mission to get me into the sack?

  A competition to show who is better?

  A game both would like to win at any cost?

  Or is it only a nice pastime?

  God, all this is so incredibly confusing!

  “Please don’t run away, Brooke,” he replies just as quietly.

  “We have all the time in the world. I won’t force you to do anything, okay?”

  Why in the world is he being so considerate?

  No matter how I look at him, I cannot figure him out.

  “Okay,” I give in.

  “Good.” He sounds satisfied.

  Is it a good sign?

  “I’ll see you in a half an hour in your room.”

  “What?” I ask confused and wait for his reply, which, however, does not come.

  When he’s gone, I unlock the door and cautiously peek outside.

  In fact. My clothes are lying neatly folded right next to the door like he said. I can’t believe it.

  A little later, I’m finally standing in the shower. I urgently need to clear my head before I freak out.

  Shaking my head, I recall today’s events as hot water pelts my naked body.

  In here, I was hoping to find answers to my concerns, yet instead, I only unearth more questions.

  Nothing is as it used to be. At times, it feels as if I no longer know the most important people in my life, as if suddenly they’re strangers. And then there are moments where it feels like we’ve never been apart.

  My life is already complicated enough and it will only become even more chaotic, I know that.

  And yet I do not regret the decision I made not even for a single second. No matter what challenges fate confronts me with, I won’t give up. For this, I’ve come too far.

  For a moment, the hot water washes away all my fears and uncertainties that accompany me like shadows. Only one question plays over and over in my mind.

  Why did you do it, Blake?

  When I return from
taking a shower, Liam is already waiting outside my door.

  My hair is still wet, but at least I’m not running half-naked into his arms. The incident with Blake taught me a lesson and for better or worse, I most likely will not forget it.

  “Hi,” I say because it doesn’t seem he’s going to say anything.

  “Would you like to come in?” I ask and clutch my things closer to me. The atmosphere between us is strangely charged.

  “Hi,” he replies smiling and assesses my appearance, which, for some reason, makes me uncomfortable.

  I inspect myself and note that everything is still intact. After all, it’s not like I want another disaster to happen. My embarrassment quota for today definitely has reached its limit.

  “I’d be happy to. After you,” he replies once he finishes ogling me.

  Nervous, I pass by him and into the room while keeping my gaze stubbornly directed ahead.

  “So, what is it you want to discuss with me?” I want to know and anxiously wait for his reply.

  Meantime, I busy myself putting my things away so it won’t get out of hand.

  I hear him quietly closing the door behind us and feel myself growing increasingly restless.

  Why am I acting this way? He simply wants to talk, not get into my panties.

  “I’ve been thinking,” he starts calmly, drawing my attention to him.

  Thinking about what?

  Since avoiding his gaze because his proximity makes me nervous would be too ridiculous, I sit on the bed and look at him curiously.

  He makes no move to join me. Instead, he leans against the wall with his arms casually crossed in front of his chest and gazes at me.

  I slide around restlessly in my seat, hoping he won’t notice.

  “About?” I inquire.

  “That today, you should not sit here at home alone.”

  “Okay,” I say drawn out while trying to make sense of his words, at which I fail.

  Why is everyone here always speaking in riddles?

  “So, in your opinion, what should I do?”

  “On Monday, you’ll be a true college girl, so we have to celebrate,” he replies with a mysterious smile before he effortlessly pushes off the wall and approaches me with confident steps.

  His movements are smooth and cocky. Everything about him is sexy. Men like him should be outlawed!

  Even before I can say anything, he gracefully goes down on his knees in front of me and puts his big hands possessively on my thighs.

  Using his thumbs, he traces little circles and gently strokes my exposed skin. Wherever his fingers touch me, delicate goose bumps spread.

  Mesmerized, I follow each of his movements, unable to look away from him, not even for a single second.

  “What are you doing?” I whisper and helplessly claw at the fabric of my duvet.

  “Relaxing you,” he simply replies, the gaze of his beautiful amber eyes still directed at me.

  “Relaxing me?” I inquire confused.

  “I’m making you nervous,” he states the obvious, rendering me a bit embarrassed. I’m not at all happy about being so easily read.

  “That you do,” I reluctantly admit.

  “I like that,” he confesses. His admission makes my pulse quicken.

  “Does that fact make you like me less?”

  “No,” I say honestly.

  I like him. A lot. Probably more than I should.

  My reply seems to satisfy him because he gives me a radiant smile.

  “I like being near you, Brooke,” he says and brushes his knuckles over my cheek.

  The innocent touch in combination with his words is enough to completely confuse me again.

  “Do you trust me?” he asks.

  Do I trust him?

  Part of me wants to answer immediately with yes. But the other, the rational part, reminds me that I actually don’t know the man who is presently kneeling before me. And since I’m not sure which is more telling, I decide to be truthful.

  “I don’t know.”

  “Just for tonight, trust me,” he asks gently. “Just this one time.”

  “What have you planned?” I ask, indecisive about whether I want to agree.

  “We’ll be going out. Celebrating the start of your new life. No obligations, no worries, just you and me.”

  My fingers itch because his proposal sounds more than tempting. Tempting and dangerous.

  Dangerous because it involves Liam and I’m sure he doesn’t half-ass things. Yet it is exactly that which excites me so much.

  What do I have to lose? It is about time I broke out of the gilded cage in which I’ve been a prisoner for far too long. I can always admonish myself later.

  “I’m game,” I quickly say before I change my mind.

  “You won’t regret it, I promise.” His voice is full of conviction. He is sure of his cause.

  Hopefully, it rings true.

  “Okay, let’s meet up downstairs in 15 minutes,” he whispers and stands up. Now he looks down on me and his gaze makes me feel petite and feminine.

  My sudden loud stomach growl instantly ruins the charged atmosphere.

  “Don’t worry, you won’t starve,” he replies amused, whereupon I glare at him furiously.

  “I’m eating myself up at any given moment. My situation is deadly serious,” I nag, not at all pleased. My appetite abruptly makes an appearance and causes a wave of nausea.

  “There’s fruit in the kitchen. That should soothe your stomach for the time being. Later on, I’ll treat you to a lavish meal. Deal?”

  “Deal,” I reply, ignoring the telltale twitching of his mouth.

  “Oh, and Brooke?”

  “Yes?”

  “If your hair is not dry by then, I will take care of it personally.”

  I gasp audibly for air as he walks out of the room grinning and leaves me.

  What have I gotten myself into?

  After I blow-dry my hair in record-breaking time and braid it into a French braid, I hurry back to my room to pick something out to wear.

  I opt for skin-tight jean shorts, a black off-the-shoulder blouse with thin spaghetti straps, which is slightly taken in at the sides and black high-heel sandals. Except for a little mascara to bring out my dark eyes, I keep my face free of makeup.

  I’ll never understand how women willingly plaster makeup on their skin. These women hide their insecurities behind masks to make them feel desirable.

  It is important to feel comfortable with your body, to stick to your convictions, and not listen to what others constantly push.

  Glancing at the clock, I see I’m in good shape. Before heading downstairs, I grab my small black shoulder bag and stop in front of the large mirror to take one last look at myself.

  My hair looks slightly disheveled, which has to stay like that whether I like it or not because I simply don’t have enough time to weave a new braid.

  Who cares, I think and shrug. Nowadays, messy hairstyles are fashionable.

  I like my outfit. It’s cute, a bit playful, exactly my thing. Not necessarily alluring for clubbing, but I feel comfortable in it, which is most important.

  My fingers automatically touch the necklace around my neck. Blake gave it to me many years ago and I just couldn’t bring myself to throw it away. Not even now, when he is so distant and condescending to me.

  I must set clear limits to protect myself from getting seriously hurt.

  Downstairs, I head straight to the kitchen and grab a juicy looking apple. I’ve clearly reached my limit and if I don’t get an actual meal soon, I can’t guarantee anything.

  At the moment, I could eat about anything. Okay, almost anything. Those icky slimy things some people call mushrooms, I’d probably not touch, even if my life depended on it.

  While I ravish the apple, I’m wondering what Shane is up to. The last time I saw him was this afternoon.

  My guilty conscience promptly makes an appearance and leaves a bad aftertaste behind.

&nbs
p; He made such an effort and what do I do?

  I sleep half the day away in my room and step from one mishap into the next.

  As much as I know him, he will not even hold it against me. The man is simply too good for this world.

  Since Liam will be here any moment, I position myself at our arranged meeting spot and wait for him.

  He did not let on where he is going to take me, which, quite frankly, makes me a little nervous.

  Sure, I’ve been to a club before, secretly of course –my mom would freak out if she’d gotten wind of it – but it’s not the same. Here in California – hundreds of miles from home – for the first time in a long time, I actually feel alive again and I definitely want to hold on to this emotion.

  “Have you been waiting long?” an all too familiar voice reaches my ears. I was so deeply lost in thought that I did not notice his approach.

  “No,” I reply smiling and try to calm my heart rate, which always seems to go haywire when he is around.

  “You look stunning,” Liam says with a charming smile, looking at me intently.

  “Thanks. You don’t look so bad yourself,” I reply with a wink of an eye, which he acknowledges with a grin.

  Not bad? It is probably the understatement of the century!

  His dark hair still has that sexy fresh-out-of-bed look, giving him an element of coolness.

  He swapped his white shirt for a tight dark blue one, which clings to his upper body like a second skin and nicely emphasizes his muscles.

  His long legs are stuck in a pair of light washed out jeans; only his well-worn Converse remain.

  “What’s he doing here?” I ask with a sour look in Blake’s direction, who merely stares at me unimpressed.

  “He’ll accompany us,” he replies as if it was the most normal thing in the world.

  “What happened to just you and me?” I inquire skeptically, ignoring the now curious look of a certain person.

  “Hey,” he says gently. “Look at me.” His voice sounds so soft and pleading, I cannot deny his request.

  “I’m not going back on my promise. The night belongs to us. Blake is going the same way we are and offered us a ride.”

  Offered? Him? Is this a joke? Why would he do such a thing?

  First, he yells at me that I’m the last person he wants to see only then to chauffer me around?